i want to be a really really good momma dear. one with amazing patience, endless cuddly kisses. letting the littles climb all over me and make BIG messes...and lots of them. laughing and giggling...tickling and talking the whole time. answering every one of those questions. O Boy! i am so far away from being the perfect momma dear. i am so afraid. afraid I'm going to lose these precious days to my tired, selfish, pregnant/breastfeeding body/mind. I want my heart to cuddle up with him when he calls me back to his room after he has been tucked in twice. Calling me back for that one last childhood mom "encore!" Oh how I should feel like an energetic rock star momma dear..."yes, my little love...lets have another cuddle for us!!" i hear this won't happen forever.... i want it to never end...but OH! i am so tired...in need of a quiet selfish evening. but if I am honestly honest...I guess I don't really need to keep feeding "me"...because when I feed them....i am being fed.
